It is natural for women to be more emotional than men, unfortunately that is the way we were created. So dealing with situations that arise in life isn't always the easiest, we find ourselves crying, not eating, losing out on sleep and overall not coping with things too well. One of the hardest things for a woman to deal with is heartbreak. When you invest so much into a situation it is hard not to become emotional and want to shut down when you have been hurt. A woman generally falls in love a lot faster than a man anyway. This is why "SEX ONLY" relationships generally do not work, the woman gets her feelings involved and ends up messed up and hurt when the man tells her that he doesn't want anything more. I came across this poem and it really spoke volumes to me:
"The Power"
So there you go again putting your power in man when once again he’s let go of your hand
when it was the Creator who carried you across the burning sand
You was happy for a while cause his body made you smile
until he left you in exile to support you and his child
Haven’t you learned yet, you can’t sleep with every man who makes you wet
and with every let down you forget that what you ask him for is what you get
Sistahs hold on to the faith you have inside there are other sistahs feeling you far and wide
Sacrificing your dignity is wrong holding onto the faith is what makes you strong
it’s the Creator who will be with you when that brotha is up and gone
Love yourself as he loves you; make the Man above your first boo
and for every blessing you give, you will get back two
if you make him first in everything you do
Cause you don’t need no shake downs or breakdowns causing you to lose you
Keep your mind strong keep your soul true and give the power back to the Creator
Lisa L. First ‘99”
Simply stating that you are a fool for allowing a man to come in and take all your power. Women are the most powerful creatures on this Earth. Think about it, Eve made Adam eat the apple, you can say it was the power of the pussy. We have the ability to break the coldest of hearts, but when you fall in love you lose sight of that power and become weak. You fall to the mercy of that man and allow him to do whatever he wants to. When are we going to learn that men could care less about our tears. That strokes their egos. Women fight over men when they should be fighting for salvation. No man is worth losing your self respect. If a man decides he no longer wants you then LET IT GO! If he decides that the relationship is no longer for him LET IT GO! You can't keep someone that doesn't want to be kept. Men don't mature until a later stage in life so you can't expect to get half of what you put out in a relationship. I don't believe in speaking in metaphors and euphemisms I say exactly what I mean. With that said I am going to say this, A man will do what you allow him to do. If you are content with letting a man walk over you, that's what he is going to do. If you allow a man to sleep with different women and still call him your man that is what he is going to do. If you know that he doesn't love you the way YOU feel YOU should be loved yet you stay, then you deserve to be played for a fool!
Find the strength within yourself to walk away when it's time. Don't try and trap him or make him stay by manipulating his feelings or having a baby(which is only going to deprive the child). It is not staying that makes you strong it is LETTING GO WHEN IT'S TIME! Stop being weak and take back your power, because in reality the only MAN obligated to love you IS GOD! He will never betray nor forsake you!
Peace and Blessings ~B~
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
"Patiently Waiting"
They say patience is a virtue, which means this is something that is moral and righteous. In a way it makes you more Christ like. They also say that all good things comes to those who wait. Is this really something that we believe or have we been conditioned to do so? There are things that you wait for, such as; a bus, your turn in line at the grocery store or the second coming of Christ. These are events and things that are sure to happen. It is a sure thing that eventually it will be your turn to checkout at Schnucks, you can bet your life that Christ is going to return for his people and you best believe that Bi-State will be rolling down the street within the next fifteen. Now who's to say you aren't going to grow impatient while waiting for these things to occur? That is only human nature and is to be expected. Now there are certain events that I wouldn't advise you spend time checking your watch on, these things included but are not limited to; a cure for cancer to be discovered, a man to leave his wife and or significant other for you, the side piece, I wouldn't advise waiting for a woman to be dressed on time. Waiting for the previous things is merely a waste of time you could have spent doing something else.
If you sat down and added up all the hours you spent doing pointless shit like waiting you would be amazed at how much time you could have saved. People spend half their lives waiting and waiting some more. We wait to grow up, we wait in line, we wait for love. Is that really how you want to spend your life? I for one am a very impatient person and waiting is not one of my strong points. I refuse to waste time that is not promised waiting for things that may or may not happen I just don't have the energy to do so. I may wait to checkout at Forever 21 only because in the end I am gaining something out of the long line, I may wait for the Metrolink, but only due in fact that I have somewhere to be if I am standing there in the first place. I am most definitely going to wait on the second coming of Christ because I know that I must in order to be saved. But unlike most I am not going to sit around all day waiting for a check from the government to take care of me and my family, I am not going to wait for a man to realize that he is loves me and I damn sure ain't sitting around waiting for the world of idiot doctors with a piece of paper to find a cure for cancer or AIDS.
We spend too much time waiting and it is almost always in vain. We wait for things we have no control over and that makes it in vain. We can not control what we can not change. Life is too short and tomorrow is never promised so why spend time waiting when it's a waste? It's kind of like waiting for pigs to fly.
~B~
If you sat down and added up all the hours you spent doing pointless shit like waiting you would be amazed at how much time you could have saved. People spend half their lives waiting and waiting some more. We wait to grow up, we wait in line, we wait for love. Is that really how you want to spend your life? I for one am a very impatient person and waiting is not one of my strong points. I refuse to waste time that is not promised waiting for things that may or may not happen I just don't have the energy to do so. I may wait to checkout at Forever 21 only because in the end I am gaining something out of the long line, I may wait for the Metrolink, but only due in fact that I have somewhere to be if I am standing there in the first place. I am most definitely going to wait on the second coming of Christ because I know that I must in order to be saved. But unlike most I am not going to sit around all day waiting for a check from the government to take care of me and my family, I am not going to wait for a man to realize that he is loves me and I damn sure ain't sitting around waiting for the world of idiot doctors with a piece of paper to find a cure for cancer or AIDS.
We spend too much time waiting and it is almost always in vain. We wait for things we have no control over and that makes it in vain. We can not control what we can not change. Life is too short and tomorrow is never promised so why spend time waiting when it's a waste? It's kind of like waiting for pigs to fly.
~B~
"Spilled Milk"
Growing up my Granny would always say, "Ain't no use in crying over spilled milk." Of course as a kid you really have no idea what that means so it would go in one ear and out the other. It has been recently that I realized exactly what that meant. I was crying the other day and my mother said, "Why are you crying over spilled milk?" I immediately stopped the waterworks and looked at her. I didn't have to wonder what the symbolic meaning was anymore.
As human beings we often try to fix things that we already knew we had no control over to begin with. Thats just human nature, so is it really something wrong with that? To a certain degree no, however what is the purpose in attemtping to change things when it's out of your control to begin with? One error that we make is trying to change people. You can not change someone and make them into who you want them to be. It's just not possible. A person has to decide if you being in their life is worth making needed changes. You may not like the way they dress or the way they wear their hair, but ultimately the choice is not up to if they start shopping in a different store or go to a different salon. You can tell them all you want that if they don't make the changes that you are going to leave them, thinking that threats are the way to go. But if you aren't that important to them they aren't going to change. What are you going to do? Are you going to get angry, cause a fuss or go your seperate ways? Nine times out of ten you are just going to get angry and cause a fuss. There's is obviously something about that person that keeps you with them, even with the flaws and imperfections. Then there is that something that hurts you, that makes you want to just walk away from it all and say it's just not worth it. At times it becomes too much to handle and you feel as though you just want to give up and call it quits. Those are those times that all you can do is cry, it is those times that you stop and ask yourself, "Why am I crying over spilled milk? Isn't this the path I chose? Didn't I know what I was getting myself into when I decided to take this path?" So what is left for you to do? You can continue crying and being angry over something you know you can't change or you can get the balls to leave a sitaution you are so unhappy in and find the happiness you know you deserve. Sure it's going to hurt, but again that's a part of life and the experience of growing. You have to learn to take the good with the bad, the pain with the joy. If you don't then there is no way you can truly evolve as a human being. So when you find yourself crying over a situation you knew wasn't going to change to begin with, stop and say," Ain't no point in crying over spilled milk. Clean the shit up, get a new gallon and decide if you're going to eat cereal or dip chocolate chip cookies."
As human beings we often try to fix things that we already knew we had no control over to begin with. Thats just human nature, so is it really something wrong with that? To a certain degree no, however what is the purpose in attemtping to change things when it's out of your control to begin with? One error that we make is trying to change people. You can not change someone and make them into who you want them to be. It's just not possible. A person has to decide if you being in their life is worth making needed changes. You may not like the way they dress or the way they wear their hair, but ultimately the choice is not up to if they start shopping in a different store or go to a different salon. You can tell them all you want that if they don't make the changes that you are going to leave them, thinking that threats are the way to go. But if you aren't that important to them they aren't going to change. What are you going to do? Are you going to get angry, cause a fuss or go your seperate ways? Nine times out of ten you are just going to get angry and cause a fuss. There's is obviously something about that person that keeps you with them, even with the flaws and imperfections. Then there is that something that hurts you, that makes you want to just walk away from it all and say it's just not worth it. At times it becomes too much to handle and you feel as though you just want to give up and call it quits. Those are those times that all you can do is cry, it is those times that you stop and ask yourself, "Why am I crying over spilled milk? Isn't this the path I chose? Didn't I know what I was getting myself into when I decided to take this path?" So what is left for you to do? You can continue crying and being angry over something you know you can't change or you can get the balls to leave a sitaution you are so unhappy in and find the happiness you know you deserve. Sure it's going to hurt, but again that's a part of life and the experience of growing. You have to learn to take the good with the bad, the pain with the joy. If you don't then there is no way you can truly evolve as a human being. So when you find yourself crying over a situation you knew wasn't going to change to begin with, stop and say," Ain't no point in crying over spilled milk. Clean the shit up, get a new gallon and decide if you're going to eat cereal or dip chocolate chip cookies."
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
"Once In This Lifetime"
Like every Friday night I was standing in front of the mirror giving myself the once over while I waited for my best friend. I was rather pleased with the outfit I'd thrown together, I didn't really feel like going anywhere but this was a standing ritual and I wasn't about to break it. I looked at the clock it was almost 930, Mya would be pulling up any minute. Just as I was about to have a second glass of wine when I saw Mya's headlights from her 2009 Mustang pulling into my driveway. Anticipating her ghetto ass blowing her horn a million times, to signal me to come out I grabbed my bag and headed for the door.
"Damn you didn't even give me a chance to let you know I was here!" Mya said looking me from head to toe as I slid in the car.
"I know! All that blowing you do is ridiculous! Wake the dead with all that!" I responded as I clicked my seat belt. "Can we go please!?"
As usual Mya was doing her Nascar driving down the city streets, with no regard for the police. I just sat back and listened to the Maxwell coming from the speakers. Within minutes we pulled in front of the new downtown club, and from the looks of things this was going to be the new place to have your face.
Mya pulled into valet and threw her keys to the driver. She stepped out of the car and all of a sudden all eyes were on us. Mya was wearing a pair of white linen pants that clung to her in all the right places, she simpled the pants by matching them with a plain white camisole. As usual she stilted her small five foot two frame on a pair of 4-inches that were to die for. She had her hair pulled back and was rocking the hugest pair of diamond studs she could find. Me on the other hand, didn't want to attract too much attention. I had decided on a simple black spaghetti strapped satin dress that stopped just a few inches short of my knees. I was wearing a pair of gold stilettos that boosted my height up to a good five foot six. My hair was draping my shoulders as I stepped aside to allow the valet to close my door.
The line to enter the club was around the corner, luckily for us we never had to stand in lines. Mya was a well known publicist and did work for many of the clubs in the city so she had pull. We walked right past the patrons waiting to enter and straight through the velvet rope. I could hear the echo of women sucking their teeth as if to say, "Who the fuck are they?" I looked at Mya as we burst into uncontrollable laughter. As always we made a b-line for the bar. I ordered my usual Manhattan and alcoholic Amy order a shot of Patron and a Long Island.
"Don't look at me like!" Mya said throwing her shot back like it was kool-aid, I just shook my head in amusement. I scanned the crowd as we took our seats at one of the all white leather booths. I like most am a people watcher so I enjoyed just sitting. The music was bumping and the overall ambiance was nice. I was giving the crowd a glance when someone caught my eye.
I saw him as he walked in the door and shook hands with the owners. He stood an estimated six foot two, his skin was flawless and the deepest shade of chocolate. He had a smile that made me want to go brush my teeth, his teeth were perfect. I watched him as he made conversation and examining every detail of his chemical make up. He had just the right amount of muscle and his waves had me feeling sea sick. I was trying not to stare but I just couldn't help myself, baby had it going on.
"Earth to Bria! Hello!" Mya had a way of spoiling a wet dream!
"What bitch!" I said with my eyes still locked on Mr. Swag.
"Excuse me? Where is your head at?" She questioned following my eyes. "Oh never mind. I see your dick radar is going crazy. My bad!" Ignoring her smart ass mouth I asked if she knew who he was.
"Oh that's just Alex McKay. He plays baseball or some shit." She played it off as if he cleaned streets. None the less I wanted him.
I sat in my designated seat for the next hour contemplating my next move. All kinds of people were stopping by our table talking to Mya but I was in a world all my own.
"Excuse me but this is for you." The young waitress said placing another Manhattan in front of me and handing me a note written on a napkin.
Confused I just said thanks and opened the neatly folded napkin.
"It's about time we get together. Meet me in the back." Confused yet inquisitive I looked around for an indication of who could have sent the note but had no clue who I was looking for. I excused myself from the booth and headed to the bathroom to freshen up.
Looking in the mirror I gave myself a silent talk. "Okay Bria, this is probably the most spontaneous thing you are ever going to do in your life. Life is all about taking chances! So let go!" I exhaled and headed for the back of the club. I walked through a door and into a private area. The lights were low, I looked around for the mystery author but still had no luck. I was about to walk out when I felt a hand grab hold of my waist. Afraid to turn around I braced myself against the door. The strong hold gripped tighter as he kissed me ever so gently on the back of neck leaving me wanting more. I allowed myself to relax and melt into his grasp as I felt his free hand slowly caress my thighs. The moisture between my legs began to drip down my legs as his kisses became more intense. He moved his hands slowly up my dress, lifting it higher and higher until my black lace panties were completely exposed. I reached behind me searching for his man hood which wasn't at all hard to find. He was standing at full attention! I slowly unzipped his pants and reached inside grabbing hold of all 9 inches. Before I could stop myself I had turned around and was on my knees in front of him with every bit of him in my mouth. Slowly taking him in inch by inch he tasted so good. I moved my tongue in unison with my hands as I listened to the moans that escaped his lips. I felt the pressure mounting as I quickened my strokes, I wanted to feel him inside me so I stopped.
Helping me off my knees he quickly turned me around and ripped off my flimsy lace. Without hesitation he dug himself deep inside me and went to work. The feelings flowing through me were ones that I couldn't explain! I felt my juices drip down to my shoes as he grabbed my hair with one hand and my hip with the other. I arched my back allowing him the ability to touch every part of me. Just as I did that I felt myself about to climax, I pushed back hard and fast. I tried to control my excitement my it was too much, I let go! I was grasping for air but I couldn't catch my breath, I felt my knees get weak and I knew it was coming. His strokes got deeper and faster as he prepared to reach his climax. Like clock work we came together. I stood motionless and speechless trying to explain to myself why I'd just done what I did. There was no explanation, I wanted it!
Once I'd gained my composure I helped him remove his dick from inside me as I fixed my dress. Sweat was dripping all over me as I searched my purse for something to dry off with. Once I felt confident that I was looking the way I had when I left the table I turned around. All I could do was smile as I stared the six foot two Alex McKay in the face. Without so much as I word he placed my ripped lace panties in his pocket, kissed my head and disappeared through the door, unfortunately it was much quicker than when he came. I walked back over the table and sat, rubbing my thighs together for there was a fire still lit between them.
"Damn you didn't even give me a chance to let you know I was here!" Mya said looking me from head to toe as I slid in the car.
"I know! All that blowing you do is ridiculous! Wake the dead with all that!" I responded as I clicked my seat belt. "Can we go please!?"
As usual Mya was doing her Nascar driving down the city streets, with no regard for the police. I just sat back and listened to the Maxwell coming from the speakers. Within minutes we pulled in front of the new downtown club, and from the looks of things this was going to be the new place to have your face.
Mya pulled into valet and threw her keys to the driver. She stepped out of the car and all of a sudden all eyes were on us. Mya was wearing a pair of white linen pants that clung to her in all the right places, she simpled the pants by matching them with a plain white camisole. As usual she stilted her small five foot two frame on a pair of 4-inches that were to die for. She had her hair pulled back and was rocking the hugest pair of diamond studs she could find. Me on the other hand, didn't want to attract too much attention. I had decided on a simple black spaghetti strapped satin dress that stopped just a few inches short of my knees. I was wearing a pair of gold stilettos that boosted my height up to a good five foot six. My hair was draping my shoulders as I stepped aside to allow the valet to close my door.
The line to enter the club was around the corner, luckily for us we never had to stand in lines. Mya was a well known publicist and did work for many of the clubs in the city so she had pull. We walked right past the patrons waiting to enter and straight through the velvet rope. I could hear the echo of women sucking their teeth as if to say, "Who the fuck are they?" I looked at Mya as we burst into uncontrollable laughter. As always we made a b-line for the bar. I ordered my usual Manhattan and alcoholic Amy order a shot of Patron and a Long Island.
"Don't look at me like!" Mya said throwing her shot back like it was kool-aid, I just shook my head in amusement. I scanned the crowd as we took our seats at one of the all white leather booths. I like most am a people watcher so I enjoyed just sitting. The music was bumping and the overall ambiance was nice. I was giving the crowd a glance when someone caught my eye.
I saw him as he walked in the door and shook hands with the owners. He stood an estimated six foot two, his skin was flawless and the deepest shade of chocolate. He had a smile that made me want to go brush my teeth, his teeth were perfect. I watched him as he made conversation and examining every detail of his chemical make up. He had just the right amount of muscle and his waves had me feeling sea sick. I was trying not to stare but I just couldn't help myself, baby had it going on.
"Earth to Bria! Hello!" Mya had a way of spoiling a wet dream!
"What bitch!" I said with my eyes still locked on Mr. Swag.
"Excuse me? Where is your head at?" She questioned following my eyes. "Oh never mind. I see your dick radar is going crazy. My bad!" Ignoring her smart ass mouth I asked if she knew who he was.
"Oh that's just Alex McKay. He plays baseball or some shit." She played it off as if he cleaned streets. None the less I wanted him.
I sat in my designated seat for the next hour contemplating my next move. All kinds of people were stopping by our table talking to Mya but I was in a world all my own.
"Excuse me but this is for you." The young waitress said placing another Manhattan in front of me and handing me a note written on a napkin.
Confused I just said thanks and opened the neatly folded napkin.
"It's about time we get together. Meet me in the back." Confused yet inquisitive I looked around for an indication of who could have sent the note but had no clue who I was looking for. I excused myself from the booth and headed to the bathroom to freshen up.
Looking in the mirror I gave myself a silent talk. "Okay Bria, this is probably the most spontaneous thing you are ever going to do in your life. Life is all about taking chances! So let go!" I exhaled and headed for the back of the club. I walked through a door and into a private area. The lights were low, I looked around for the mystery author but still had no luck. I was about to walk out when I felt a hand grab hold of my waist. Afraid to turn around I braced myself against the door. The strong hold gripped tighter as he kissed me ever so gently on the back of neck leaving me wanting more. I allowed myself to relax and melt into his grasp as I felt his free hand slowly caress my thighs. The moisture between my legs began to drip down my legs as his kisses became more intense. He moved his hands slowly up my dress, lifting it higher and higher until my black lace panties were completely exposed. I reached behind me searching for his man hood which wasn't at all hard to find. He was standing at full attention! I slowly unzipped his pants and reached inside grabbing hold of all 9 inches. Before I could stop myself I had turned around and was on my knees in front of him with every bit of him in my mouth. Slowly taking him in inch by inch he tasted so good. I moved my tongue in unison with my hands as I listened to the moans that escaped his lips. I felt the pressure mounting as I quickened my strokes, I wanted to feel him inside me so I stopped.
Helping me off my knees he quickly turned me around and ripped off my flimsy lace. Without hesitation he dug himself deep inside me and went to work. The feelings flowing through me were ones that I couldn't explain! I felt my juices drip down to my shoes as he grabbed my hair with one hand and my hip with the other. I arched my back allowing him the ability to touch every part of me. Just as I did that I felt myself about to climax, I pushed back hard and fast. I tried to control my excitement my it was too much, I let go! I was grasping for air but I couldn't catch my breath, I felt my knees get weak and I knew it was coming. His strokes got deeper and faster as he prepared to reach his climax. Like clock work we came together. I stood motionless and speechless trying to explain to myself why I'd just done what I did. There was no explanation, I wanted it!
Once I'd gained my composure I helped him remove his dick from inside me as I fixed my dress. Sweat was dripping all over me as I searched my purse for something to dry off with. Once I felt confident that I was looking the way I had when I left the table I turned around. All I could do was smile as I stared the six foot two Alex McKay in the face. Without so much as I word he placed my ripped lace panties in his pocket, kissed my head and disappeared through the door, unfortunately it was much quicker than when he came. I walked back over the table and sat, rubbing my thighs together for there was a fire still lit between them.
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